remembering when

Dear Ian,

yesterday was a day that started to try my patience, not you my son, but the rest of the population.  Then I meet you at your cousins school for their fall festival.  This is a wonderful, fun, fundraising event.  However, this year I did not enjoy it, and we left early.  They had all sorts of little games set up in the gym for the kids to play.  You would run around and try to take all the little toys to play with and interfere with the other kids trying to play.   You were not being bad, you just didn’t understand the concept of the games.  But, oh boy! were you mad at me for not letting you play!  So we had to leave.  Once we got home you did not want to go to sleep.  Each time you would close your eyes to fall asleep you would wake up and say something cute and wonderful that would make me smile.  But you were refusing to fall asleep! So I put you in your crib to fall asleep on your own.

This made me think about when you were born.  I have to tell you it is a good thing I have the patience of a stone 😀 cause you and sleep were not friends.

When you were born we had lots of problems with feeding, which I won’t go into with you, as I am sure you do not want to hear about it 🙂 But you were on breast milk which tends to not stay in your stomach as long as formula so you need to eat more often.  You did not like to eat a lot on each feeding, just enough to not be hungry anymore.  No matter what I tried you would want to eat every 1.5 to 2 hours.  But you were so sweet and as long as you were fed you didn’t cry.

Then you started crying all the time.  You would throw up what ever it was you ate.  I don’t mean you would spit up the excess, I mean you would throw up all the time.  You would cry, it was so hard to see.  It was like you were in so much pain.  My poor baby, I didn’t know what to do.  We saw your doctor and you had to have an ultrasound on your tummy to make sure there was no obstructions.  Your organs were fine and we watched you swallow with the ultrasound and it was working fine.  Sometimes the thing about premature babies is that not all your organs are complete and functional yet.  The esophageal sphincter is not always fully formed and that can cause food to come back up.  You also had some acid reflux problems and we had to put you on medicine.  Your poor belly had such a hard time digesting food.

All these things caused such sleepless nights and you cried so much.  It was so hard to see you like that.  Everyone says it was colic, but I don’t feel that was true.  I feel like your little organs just weren’t ready to start working yet.  You eventually got better, but you still didn’t like to sleep.





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